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Saturday, May 19, 2012

Cleveland - Land of Mystery

It's like a modern-day Amityville Horror - A family walks into a house of berserkers, some real, some imagined, some undead, after buying a home where a young man once massacred his family as they slept. Or something like that...

I read an article in the news today about a woman who, parked outside her home in Cleveland, got into an argument with her best friend in a car. She got out of the car, went into the house, grabbed a knife and came back outside and stabbed her friend in the face and neck.

The friend then hit the gas in the auto - some say in an attempt to run down the crazy woman who had just stabbed her face and neck - and proceeded to run down two of her mad friend's children, one of whom was killed by the car. The bleeding woman driving the automobile was not arrested and promptly died of her wounds, but not before also plowing into the house and destroying the front porch. The woman with the knife was arrested a short time later, just a couple of blocks away. She was naked when police nabbed her.


The House

As it turns out, this house of tragedy is located just down the street from a house where the bodies of 11 murdered women were found in 2009. Nice neighborhood. Amityville was never this active. I am guessing the entire area rests on what was once the burial grounds of some peace-loving tribe of Native Americans who hunted, fished, lived and died along the banks of the Lake of Erie. And now they're pissed. Don't be surprised if a few square miles around this area inexplicably bursts into flames, And soon.

I do, however, have a couple of questions about the timeline here and the actions of those involved...

First of all, if I am in an argument with someone and they get so heated that they get out of the car to run inside to get a knife with which to stab my face and neck, chances are my vehicle will not still be in the driveway when they come back out. In fact, I will be driving down the street, past the other murder house, singing along with Huey Lewis and The News and will already have made a mental note to unfriend my crazy bitch friend as soon as I get home. Then I will have cocoa. Also, the car was running... If you see your batshit insane friend running back out with a knife, club, rolling pin, sturdy block of wood or shotgun (loaded or not), put the vehicle in reverse and get the hell out of there, pronto. At least roll up the window, so you can stick your tongue out and flip birds and the most damage the attacker can do is slice your tires.

Secondly, if you have stabbed your best friend in the face and neck to make a point and they have subsequently run down two of your children in the aftermath, do you run off without taking care of your young? And at what point do your clothes come off? I am confused here, as this goes against everything I have ever heard about maternal instinct and all that. And the innate need to stay clothed in public, especially when brandishing a weapon.

All in all, this story is disturbing and not just a little confusing. I am sure that things will make more sense once all the facts come out and that none of it will be pretty. I feel bad for the children that were ultimately affected by this nonsense and hopefully the child that survived the tragedy will grow up happy and healthy.

I know crazy things happen every day and it is just another reason that I believe the world is based on chaos and not fate. We all make decisions and it is not destiny that causes us to run into the house after a knife so that we can murder our best friend and as a tragic bi-product watch our kids run down and killed. This is not fate, this is temper. And this is cause and effect at its darkest. The bottom line is that we need to watch our P's and Q's and count to ten every once in awhile, before dashing for the cutlery drawer. And don't park drunk. You're welcome.

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