What the roses mean...

Jesus, apparently there is an entire hidden code-system in the delivery of roses worthy of the Enigma Machine. Who knew that delivering different quantities of roses could have hidden messages? I always based the quantities of roses that I would send to a maiden on the amount of currency I had in my wallet, divided by the degree of commitment I was willing to commit to the relationship being celebrated.

I was astonished to learn on my drive home this evening that the amount of red roses one sends a lady expresses the level of love and commitment to the lady in question. Who knew? It turns out that a single rose is a symbol of infatuation. I thought it was a symbol that I only have a buck and a half in my pocket and how far will that get me in the sexual sweepstakes...

I may have forgotten some of the details, but this is what I recall:
A Single rose means: Love at first sight.
3 roses means: I am falling for you - but in a powerful way.
A dozen roses means: Be mine - thinking of you 12 months a year.
13 roses means: I'm your secret admirer.
15 roses means: Please forgive me.
2-dozen roses means: I am yours - thinking of you 24 hours a day.

That said, after diligent research, here are the meanings behind some forgotten numbers of roses:
5 roses means: I should've had a V-8.
7 roses means: I swear to everything holy that I won't come in your mouth.
8 roses means: I would like you to be my number one bitch.
9 roses means: Could you leave quietly, please?
10 roses means: I spilled some cheap brandy on your carpet - forgive me.
11 roses means: I think about you 11 months out of the year.

I was equally surprised at these findings - if you have any insights of your own of further lore regarding any other numbers, please let me know and in the meantime, have a delightful Valentine's day.